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Life on the sphere is hardly ever fair...and so we introduce Bac Ho.... again. | |
Brass Monkey
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Drum kit under serpent's bum No hands No fingers No dum ditty dum. In the distance monkeys drum Dum ditty dum ditty Dum, dum, dum. Patient serpent, boredom come. Still no ditty, still no dum. Monkeys come and monkeys hum Hum drum, hum drum Hum hum hum. Bored old serpent, Heads hit drum. Dumdumdumdum Dum, dum, dum. Monkeys come, with bongo drums. Dum ditty dum ditty Dum, dum, dum. "Hello Bac" "Hello Snake" Shake hands, shake hands Shake, shake, shake. "Goodbye Snake" "Goodbye Bac" Beating on the drums now Whack, whack, whack. Many monkeys Many more snakes Trashing drumkits Break, break, break. |
"What?", murmured a startled Hanuman from his hammock strung between two coconut trees on the Ridge of Retribution. "StomperLand is being invaded by Hydra, we have to get you out of here", replied an obviously concerned Clan Elder. Hanuman wasn't going to fall into the trap of the stubborn Aries. Full of excitement he dutifully followed the Elder over the ridge and on to the home gate. Could this mean he was to leave StomperLand for the first time in his 200 days on the sphere... it looked a distinct possibility. "Where am I going?", questioned Hanuman "Nowhere, if these Hydra scouts keep watching your every step". Hanuman watched as yet another Frazzles scout was violently removed from the sphere. He listened intently to the discussions of the Council of Elders. It seemed that Hydra had been building up a huge force a mere 20 hexes north of the StomperLand border, not a big issue really as Hydra had for a long time had free access to the gates surrounding StomperLand. What caused the trouble was the extermination of a Bac Ho scout breeder. Not just any scout breeder, but the mother of the Glorious Trio, three scouts who in one day spotted 9 foreign halls. There was some confusion as to exactly what followed, but the Bac Ho Department of Retaliation bore the brunt of much abuse from the Council of Elders. "Aries Rock!", said Elder Nostalgia, "The Hydra forces are at least 50 days from there... we can regroup and prepare for glory" "No", said Elder Negative, "There's already an escape plan in effect. Send the Hall to the intermediate gate and from there to freedom" "Have you seen the scouts harassing the intermediate gate? At least here we've got some fighter support... I say we stay here and fight", said Elder Last Stand "What about this?", said Elder Insanity, "Hanuman jumps SW, towards the front line of the Gimli lynching. All their scouts are gating here, they'd have no idea. OK so we can't see all the peaks surrounding the landing zone, but our breeders have been walking past there for weeks without getting shot at, so there can't be anyone nasty in those hills. Nobody would suspect a thing" Elder Insanity was ejected from the meeting. His views were dangerous... in the end the safety of Aries Rock was chosen. A 3 day wait in flight mode as the incoming scouts were exterminated. Then the day arrived. "GO!", shouted the Elders And Hanuman went. He liked Elder Insanity, the only one to refer to him by name. Hanuman would show the rest of the Elders, he was a master tactician, not one to be pushed around by the views of the old and senile. Hanuman walked through the gate and took the Insanity Option. |
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"What the hell are you doing down there!?!?", shouted an irate Elder. "There's a nasty looking Mercenary fighter on the mountain to my south". "Don't worry", said the Elder, "Mercenary is neutral. I've already sent a message to him. GimpCO have no idea you're there... and there's no reason why a neutral clan would tell them. I'll let you know what he says." Twenty hours went by, no word from the Elders. The Dark Angels hall sat beside Hanuman, it too had been swayed by the words of Elder Insanity. Hanuman reconfigured to survival mode... and with no Elders telling him what to do, for the first time he gave himself some guns. |
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 The incoming shells from the Mercenary fighter were hardly a surprise. It had become apparent this clan was in no way neutral. A large group of ORZ fighters to the north preparing for a surprise attack on Aries Rock suddenly veered south. Small and fast, these fighters had a large breeder support and it was not long before the first shells started to hit their mark. What was surprising was the way the fighters concentrated their fire on the lower tech Dark Angels hall. Shields crumpled and the Dark Angels Hall was immediately on the brink of destruction. ORZ the merciful offered terms to Dark Angels which were accepted, then turned his guns on Hanuman. 70 ORZ titans had rapidly gathered in the area. The S.O.S. went out to the four non-GimpCO aligned clans in the area. All offered their assistance. It was unlikely that these clans would be able to stop ORZ but it was nice to know that Bac Ho had friends. The Stompers on Gimli lynching duty were also running rapidly north to meet ORZ, but to no avail. They weren't fast enough, and ORZ were. Gimli arrived on the scene with a large Gen380 fighter and immediately started laying into Hanuman. Cameleons the third member of GimpCO (the fourth if you count the "neutral" Merenary) was content to sit on a mountain taunting Hanuman with its big evil eyes. A diplomat from ORZ arrived, demanding a surrender. Other clans in GimpCO wanted to hang Hanuman, but ORZ was confident he could convince them otherwise. A diplomat from Gimli arrived, demanding a surrender. Other clans in GimpCO wanted to hang Hanuman, but Gimli was confident he could convince them otherwise. Forever in the shadow of Aries, Hanuman wasn't one to make the same mistakes of his predecessor. He could have surrendered, but for one thing. He had guns! He liked having guns! He liked shooting guns!  |
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Hanuman hungered for vengeance, he wasn't going anywhere.  |
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Thank you Hanuman, a fine work of art. Drama does seem to bring out the best in you. It is becoming a habbit though, don't you think? |
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